I Dropped It…
This Just Happened When I Took My Bananas Out Of A Bag
The Owner Of The Apartment Told Us It Will Be A Green/Blue Party. (Blue Is A German Expression For Being Drunk And Green For Weed). This Guy Thought We Make A Costume Party
Well, Good Morning
Kid On The Scooter Had A Bad Day
This Guy Who Didn’t Want To Risk His Wiper Blade
Only Realised They Were There After The Flash
This Happened To The Plane Mid-Flight. The Whole Plane Shook And Our Collective Buttholes Puckered
A Porcupine Fell From A Tree And Fell On Her Head. The Apex Of Unluckiness
This Is What Happens When You Forget To Roll Your Window Up Before A Snowstorm
Sh*t
Now What?
See You In Court, Palmer Paint Products
Yep, That’s Snow
A Girl I Know Went To The Zoo And Accidentally Dropped Her Phone. She Didn’t Want It Back
How To Lose At Life
The New Milk My Mom Bought Tastes Funny
I Selected A Window Seat To Avoid Human Contact
Wore A Shoelace As A Belt For Work Today Out Of Desperation. Now The Office Thinks I’m The “Thong Guy”
Well This Happened Today…
My Mom Almost Crashed Her Car Today Cause A Snake Started Coming Out Of Her Vents While She Was Driving
When All I Want To Do Is Make Spaghetti, But All Signs Point To It Not Happening
So I Think I Might Just Go Back To Bed… FML
Well, Sh*t
When You Slice A Bread And Can’t Make The Sandwich
